Stand Up

I'm 288 pages into Escape by Carolyn Jessop and every page has put me into shock.  Here are a few of the more shocking trials Carolyn has had to endure as a member of the FLDS:

• She was forced into marriage at the age of 18 to a 50-year-old.
• She was one of 7 wives of this 50-year-old.
• She was forced to procreate as often as possible and birthed 8 children in a 15 year span, many of these high-risk.

Here is a brief wikipedia explanantion of the FLDS.

Carolyn was basically like a piece of property to her husband Merrill and because of her religion could not stand up for herself.   At first, she didn't want to.  She'd been brainwashed since birth that the world outside of their religion was bad.  That no one was kind or cared about others.  That it was unsafe.  But then one of her children had a tumor on his spinal cord and she spent weeks in the hospital with him and was amazed by the kindness showed to her and Harrison.  That was one of the moments that made her realize the world was not so bad.  Her husband also forced her to work at a motel he owned away from the family for a time where she felt unsafe because there was a man her husband hired who was stalking her.  There was another man, James, who was a caretaker on the property who protected Carolyn and made her feel important. 

The polygamy described in this book seems surreal.  It is hard to imagine there are families living like this in our country today.   It just seems so far removed from the world I know.  Not to judge, but it is a world I would not want to live in.  I'm obviously not finished yet, but I think I can predict the developing theme, "Stand up for your beliefs."  Carolyn has just started to do this.  She wrote a 17-page letter to Warren Jeffs, the current leader.   She summarizes what she wants in the memoir, "I began writing a letter to Jeffs that told my side of the situation.  I wanted to be allowed to live in the community but away from Merril and in a space of my own...It took me several weeks but I finally had a seventeen-page letter that detailed the awful history of abuse that Merril had dealt out to his wives and children" (Jessop 278).  I know she eventually escapes, because the book starts by describing the night she escapes with her children.  I have about 130 pages left and am eager to discover how she builds up the courage to stand up for her beliefs.